Imperishable Inheritance

Solomon, a man blessed by God with wisdom, gives us some of the most profound wisdom regarding our inter-personal relationships:

"Better is open rebuke Than love that is concealed. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy." (Pro 27:5-6)

Reflecting on this often quoted passage makes me realize how important this teaching is. Often we can be consumed with friendships that are only surface level and don't challenge us to grow and mature in our walks with God. A man can be surrounded by a countless amount of people to praise him if that's what he desires, but that kind of existence is ill-advised and futile.

I have learned to deeply treasure the friends in my life that are open and honest with me no matter how hard it might be to convey those thoughts. Think about someone you love; with that person in mind try and imagine a relationship with that person where you simply love them under the surface. When they act inappropriately, you simply keep it to yourself. If you truly love that person, as Solomon says, you will rebuke them. That doesn't mean rebuke should form the focus of your relationship, but you have entered a place where you are concerned enough with one another to tell one another the truth.

All those people who appear to be friends who will tell you what your flesh wants to hear proves they are not truly your friend. The wounds inflicted by a friend are far more valuable, long-lasting, and God-honoring. When you are wounded in some way you learn a lesson that you avoid in the future (such as the purpose of pain). When you were a kid and touched the hot stove you learned quickly to not do that again, and your parents clearly convey that to you when you do. You learn and grow in experience and wisdom from the event. Granted, the example of a stove is trivial; but it extends further into lessons on relationships, life pursuits, and our savoring of Jesus Christ through experience.

Cherish those friends that are honest even when it hurts. Those are the friends that care unconditionally for you in a manner reminiscent of our heavenly father. Those friends will be the ones that help "bear your burdens" (Gal 6:2). They will not desert when things are bad, and they will be joyful with you when those times come. They are invaluable, and I am eternally grateful for God providing those friends.