Dangers of Relational Evangelism: A Rejoinder
Recently, Doug Pollock stopped by to comment on a post a did a while back on some of the dangers in over-emphasizing the relational aspect of evangelism in lieu of actually sharing the Gospel. In that post, I use an example from a book entitled Irresistible Evangelism to which Doug is one of the authors. He commented that I had misused his golf course analogy. Here are my original comments.
I once flipped through a book that caught my eye entitled Irresistible Evangelism by the former pastor of the Cincinnati Vineyard. I was flipping through and found a horrific graphic that summarized their philosophy of evangelism.1 Basically, the analogy is between golf hole and evangelism. When you golf you don't just shoot it straight into the hole (unless you're insanely good), but instead you take one shot into the fairway, then up to the green, then finally in the hole. And each of these steps correlates to the relational process you move through in their method of evangelism. You don't start off with the Gospel, because you need to first "get it up to the green." This methodology clearly shows their Arminian/decisional regeneration theology.
This analogy, I think, most clearly shows what relational evangelism can go to taken to an extreme. We must first ask: Did anyone in the whole Bible present the truth of God only after the tee and fairway shots? Jesus calls his disciples from the very beginning to repentance, and Peter and Paul both giving stirring Gospel presentations to the masses. I would imagine that if there was a model to clone it would be these gentlemen, but each of these men also contextualized the Gospel to their audience.
I of course don't want to misuse something, and if I have done so I want to be corrected; so I asked Doug to write a short rejoinder.
I would share your concerns about too much friendship and not enough evangelism as well. The bigger idea of the golf course analogy was simply to help Christians see that God's word clearly presents the idea of evangelism from a holistic perspective. Way to many Christ followers find a club (a method) that they feel comfortable with and then take it to their golf course everyday. Effective evangelism starts where people are in relationship to God not where we would like them to be. My admonition to Christ followers is to go to their golf course everyday with a full bag of clubs. You will never see Jesus do the exact same thing with the different people He encounters along the way. Sometimes He did a good deed, sometimes He raised questions, sometimes He shared Good news. Apparently He understood that different folks need different strokes. The golf course analogy is just a metaphor intended to encourage people to bring the whole gospel to the whole person. Some days that means we will sow, some days water, and some days we will harvest. If you would like to better understand my take on the whole thing go to my website at GodsGPS.com. There is one article I wrote for Outreach Magazine that might best articulate what in particular the way we should be intentional in our efforts to move the ball ahead on the golf course.
I am curious as to the thoughts my readers have. Did I take it out of context? Does Doug's explanation ease your mind on this?
Aug 1st 2008 
8 Comments 
Aug 2nd 2008
The one thing I was originally leery about the analogy was that the Gospel was put as something you had to wait on before you can bring it out. The problem I see in "relational evangelism" (that is, the broader definition) is that you can too easily become more worried about losing a friendship than sharing the Gospel. I always find it's easier to share, build a friendship on truth, and it always, always works out just fine.
I am very familiar with the relational aspect of ministry working both with Bridges International in college, and my excursions to the Muslim world. I defend that and contextualization very strongly on this site.
Aug 2nd 2008
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Parables of a Prodigal World
Aug 2nd 2008
You wrote in your original post:
"Peter and Paul both giving stirring Gospel presentations to the masses"
When I look at Phillip and the eunuch, I see Phillip "beginning with that very passage of Scripture, he explained the good news about Jesus."
Paul commented on the Athenians search for the unknown God and didn't even lay out his sermon from Old Testament stories.
Each started at the place of the listener and moved them forward.
Likewise Jesus started with "Repent and believe the good news."
I think Doug, yourself, and I would all agree about many times relational evangelism being too much relationship and not enough evangelism.
I haven't read the original context but am familiar with the illustration. I think Doug's answer is satisfactory and I agree with him.
Chris W EvangelismCoach.org
Aug 6th 2008
This has been a tough issue for me. I disagree with the Vineyard church you mentioned, but it I also disagree that relationships are irrelevant in evangelism. Values are transmitted through relationships, which is why evangelism and discipleship is most effective at a relationship level. I don't mind doing street witnessing, but if I did lead someone to Christ I would feel horrible just saying, "Seeya!" and not making any attempt at follow-up to make sure they get in a church. As for discipleship, I have no clue how that would NOT occur in a relationship. All of the people who impacted me the most were people with whom I had a relationship, and I think most people who echo this.
Aug 6th 2008
By the way, I think open-air preaching is great, but I evangelists using such a method seem to be more interested in preaching the gospel loudly rather than contextually. I remember a fundamental baptist church "invading" the main street of my town, with megaphones and huge banners that said "Repent!" This is idiotic, I thought, because we aren't in a Jewish culture, nobody knows what repentance is---nor will they find out as they drive by. The rest of the group just stood awkwardly on street corners dressed up almost to the point of looking like Mormons. The whole situation screamed, "We're not like you and you don't really understand us, but become one of us anyway!"
Aug 6th 2008
@Keith: Thanks for your comments. I don't think anyone in this thread doesn't think relationships have a value in relationships. My only concern, and it seems yours as well, is when the relationship is elevated over the oration of the Gospel.
I also have similar sentiments to you on open-air preaching.
Aug 12th 2008
The point that is relevant and appropriate is this: Jesus and the disciples recorded in scripture spoke to their fellow men with relevance.
Often, today's Christians and churches will speak using the same terms, the same phrases and it just doesn't have the same meaning. How many of you heard sheep? How many of you fish for a living? How many of us live in an occupied country that serves the occupier almost as slaves? Not many.
Here's a story an modern evangelist, I'll call him Joe, relayed to me:
He sat down next to a construction worker on a public bench at lunch one day. Started up a conversation by asking the man what he did. The man replied that he was a Welder. Joe with interest asked what that meant getting more details about the man's job. The man gave a description and Joe replied "that's a lot like what Jesus does." The man was a bit dumbfounded and asked Joe what he meant. Joe went on to relate how the man welds to pieces of metal together. Joining together parts that were separated. Joining them together so well that the joint is just as strong as the two pieces. Jesus does that with us. He joined God and man - who were separated - with a bond that can't be broken.
That's how we should relate. Not preach to the people we come across, but find ways to relate. Be interested in the people we talk to really care about them. Love them.
After all, Jesus was a good speaker, but I doubt thousands followed him around and listen to him for hours without food because of his eloquence. They were amazed at how he related to them - and cared for them.
Nov 5th 2008
I understood the first in the context of Doug's follow up. Doug's rejoinder is right on. I propose that if we build relationships based on 2 Timothy 2:23-26; 2 Peter 1:6-9 and Galatians 5:22-3 we will discern the proper "club" for any particular course. Further, that "if we focus on living in the light of the Christian message and explaining that message to non believers rahter than on sharpening our theological prowess" (from: The Dictionary of Early Christain Beliefs) (or cutting folks with with the "sword of truth") , many will come to know Christ from our relationships in love with them.